Tis fascinating to see what is our customers focus and tastes as the years roll by.  We are never making an evenly distributed palette of furniture, instead our sales action comes in clumps of furniture types and clumps of wood types.  Occasionally I get home (or in this case office) shots, which is a treat for us, to see the furniture actually in use. This bench is midway up Long island in a Naturopaths' waiting room. Nice to know it gets a revolving team of kids climbing on it and getting read to by their parents while they sit on it. This one is 66" long.

All this media discussion about conflict and how to deal with it, but I'm not so sure conflict needs to happen or even is desirable. Is conflict a secondary experience, the result of a persons creepy feelings which arise around different ideas and opinions which need to be reconciled so we can function and excel as a group? Whatever that group is- school, committees, work, meetings and so on. Can we move beyond the feelings of conflict and simply see our differences as merely requiring work? Here is a LinkedIn post I was compelled to write after seeing the discussions about "conflict" banking, and how to relax during conflict. Assumptions that conflict is inevitable. 

"Conflict or Adjusting our assumptions and goals? After having just spent some time in a conflict avoidant culture and observing how differing ideas are reconciled while avoiding a feeling of conflict, I think most of us are underskilled at dealing with differences. In other words fears and yucky feelings frequently arise when conflicting ideas need to be addressed. I think as leaders we can do a lot to create a world where differences are an opportunity to reach a higher level of group excellence. Posturing for dominance or puffery  becomes  crass and foreign to the group, while creative thinking becomes infectious and exciting."

I don't think conflict is inevitable at all. Differences in ideas and feelings are inevitable. But those differences do not have to be a threat to our sense of self. After all, isn't the "self" more of an allegation than a fact?